Freedom From Attachment to Outcomes

I catch myself being out of flow more often than not. Usually when I am not in flow I am indulging myself in victim-hood, in suffering, in overwhelm, and in powerlessness. Sometimes it feels good to indulge myself in those emotions and to roll around in it for a bit and try it on. However, if I’m not careful, I can start to wear it like an identity and let it get too familiar, too comfortable, and too easy. These days I get out of flow easily and pulling myself back into it becomes more difficult.

Flow, energetically speaking, feels like a cool day with a gentle breeze after a week of suffocating heat and humidity. It can also feel like the heat of the sun on your shoulders after the chill of winter breaks into spring. Flow feels like a release and an energetic movement that shows up feeling like well-being, ease, peace, and contentment, like floating down the lazy river and drinking life in as it moves around you. To get here, I have to drop my resistance, I have to muster up my trust, and I have to let things go that I’ve been determined to hang onto. It’s not always easy to do, but once it’s done the results are delicious.

I’ve always been amazed at how my life unfolds when I’ve had enough of feeling terrible, and invite possibility into my life. Asking myself those questions of “what if….” and imagining everything that can come my way if I allow it, is usually enough to crack the hard shell of my resistance and let in fresh air, ideas, and opportunities. I wear resistance like armour that doesn’t allow me to grow or move freely, or to be anything other than a caged being. When I take it off, the whole world feels different.

What I enjoy most about flow is the way others operate in it. As we move through the societal system of life, we are constantly being organized into straight rows and narrow paths, pushed along to reach a destination whether it feels right to us or not. We pass by little windows and get a glimpse of our dreams, but before we can ever claim them we’re made to move along to the next milestone in life: education, a promotion, a house, a family, etc. I think many people have gone through life with regret, and many wonder what life could have been like if they followed their instincts and their intuition — explored a different way of living. Now, I think many of us are waking up — men and women alike — and realizing there is a way for us to create an abundant life for ourselves (in whatever way that means to each individual), and walking that narrow path isn’t suitable anymore. The world as a whole is shifting, and the way we get to live is shifting as well.

Flow, to me, is the freedom of attachment from outcomes. It’s doing things in our lives because it feels right to do them. It’s following our inner guide to act and feel and gravitate towards that which serves us most. Flow is finding ways to improve our lives not just externally, but internally, energetically, spiritually. I think flow is a deep and knowing connection that we’re heading in the right direction and we don’t have to control the tide or the trajectory, and it allows us a deeper sense of presence in where we are now, so we can easily move along through life on this planet.

I’m not in flow now, but talking about it is the first step to opening myself back up to it, and letting it into my life — so I can let life into me.

Written by: Sandra Barnhart