Flow Knows Better Than Me
What is it to be in flow? I can tell you, this writing adventure has helped me crystallize the concept in my mind. I sat down to write this three separate times this week. I was playing over the concept in my mind of flow, and ironically, the flow of writing did not come. Those apparently were not the times to be in flow. I could have forced it, like in university when the deadline for a paper was looming (usually due the next day). It was a do or fail kind of moment and so I did force it. Guaranteed it wasn’t my best work. By the mere fact that it felt like work it means that flow was out of the equation.
I’ve been searching for inspiration this week. Using my thinking brain, I’ve been scanning articles, bookmarking inspirational sites, checking social media feeds, all in the hopes that an image or quote would spark the flow that I’ve been yearning for. Again, the act of trying makes flow laugh even harder at me and say, “Nope, not now either.”
Flow comes when I am still, when I am quiet enough to hear the whisper of the inspiration. Flow comes when I am simply being. It comes when I am guided by gut, by intuition, by the very opposite of thinking. When I am in flow the words fly onto the screen with ease. My fingers fly over the keyboard in a symphony of rhythmic clicking. It’s easy. It’s energizing. Time passes without me even being aware of it.
Flow knows better than me. Flow doesn’t show up when I am angry, or desperate, or in a state of lack or fear. Flow finds me on days where I have taken time for myself. Flow finds me when I am meditating. Flow finds me when I am out in my garden or walking in the forest. Flow finds me when my heart is bursting with love as my kids come rushing at me when I walk through the door. Flow finds me when I take that leap of faith, and allow the inspiration to come in its time and not in mine.
A recent example of flow is in my Huna healing practice. For months I have been trying to advertise, to get more clients, to network, to get my name out there as a healer. I finally surrendered and let go of the trying. It made me tired, and truthfully, a little cranky. I know I put the intention out. I know I built the practice and the reputation with my current clients. I had to trust that this was enough and guess what? More clients have come, now that I have stopped trying. More opportunities to connect with other practitioners in a meaningful way have come to me, now that I have stopped trying. Trying causes friction, it keeps me stuck. And because I want to flow freely and effortlessly I will unlearn the old saying that has played in my head like a broken record. No doubt, you’ve heard it, “if at first you don’t succeed, try and try again.” I will instead replace it with the eternal brilliance and wisdom of Yoda. “Do or do not, there is no try.”