Hold the Vision. Trust the Process
Truth is, I’m not really down with details. Right or wrong, I’m an intuitive leaper. I see it, and in one nano second I become it with every part of my being, hair balls and all. Kicker is that it can take some time for that to be realised in the “real world”. It can take some time for the details to line up (the irony!), and yet when I look behind me, they are all in perfect formation to support me. With precision. It’s quite remarkable, if I do say so my bad-ass-self.
These days, I’m right into it, and frankly, I have been since 2009 when the vision of an online homeopathic community leapt out of my head and scribbled itself into a notebook. I had been struggling with a patient’s case and researching all the places I expected her response to the remedy to go. It’s hard to describe quickly, but the most amazing thing about being a Homeopath is witnessing the body as it cures itself, how it unwinds itself back to health. It is a real-life choose your own adventure novel, the next page of the story will read exactly as what the patient needs to tell his or herself. My job is to keep up, and when that person looks over and says “what now?”, they need me to be standing there already. They need me to know what to do, and with confidence, prescribe the next action. Given my own creative process, I was born to do this work. I see it, follow the thread with research, and land exactly where my patient needs me to be. With precision.
That night though, I was really struggling. My patient was brilliant, in that she was really committed to being well, but this actually meant it was hard to direct her. She would do her own research in between follow-ups, and frequently un-do what her homeopathic treatment had achieved. Frustrated, I wished I could call a colleague, but she was three time zones behind me, asleep. That was when I saw what I actually needed, in its totality. I needed my colleague’s expertise, and I also needed my patient to be able to Google reliable information about homeopathy on her own. That would be the ideal. Homeopaths would have round the clock access to each other’s knowledge, and the people we treat would have access to reliable information. It could all work so much faster and easier. Both sides of the patient-practitioner relationship would be empowered.
The vision of this community network was really clear. My intuition is like that, and impossible for me to refute. It just is, and that thing I see or feel becomes instantly real. After a few days, I called someone I knew about building it. He actually said it couldn’t be done, and so the quest was born. The words “you can’t do that” are fuel for me.
It’s eight years later now, and the details of this vision quest include all the necessary components: the steep up-track; the wiseman along the road; the hallucinations (I think?); the fire swamp; the pirates; two shamans; a high priestess; and yes, I did drink the Kool-Aid. I had to get to the end of the earth as quickly as possible, because in my choose-your-own adventure novel, the adventure itself was the precise training program I needed to land, to create from scratch the impossible: a patient-centric homeopathic community.
So here we are, Ladies, it’s beer o’clock somewhere, and this week we’re discussing the structures we use to nurture the seeds we sow. I have lots. I have to. The details are overwhelming and it is not in my nature to care about any of them. I’ve had so many failures rooted in my carefree-ness, far too many to count. I’ve had to learn the tools to organise myself, and frankly, I’m the linchpin in this here guild we call Consciously Woman. My connection to your brilliance, your examples, is perhaps the greatest tool in my pack. The unique tool I can reflect back to you on your journey; however, is self-trust. I trust myself fully. I’m not always sure how I’m going to pull it off, or how long it will take, but I do know that when that little voice inside me says “hey lady – this,” I know that it’s right, and that a few dance moves down the road, I will have made it happen. With precision.
Always, I am grateful for our weekly conversations, but this week especially. It has given me the opportunity to look back on my path from a completely different perspective. I make mistakes all of the time, and admittedly I do play that ego-game with myself every day, by asking – will you express or be crushed by your own brilliance? Having the opportunity to look at my own process and decide what tool I could offer you – or want for you to experience, to make it easier – it would be that: hold the vision; trust the process; trust your self. It already knows for you.
Written by: Adrienne Yeardye