Flow to Grow
Written by: Melanie Groves; Immersion Coaching
Raise your hand if you get stuck in the “I need to fix this” loop, even when the “fix” is completely outside of your control.
I think we’ve all been there. I know I have. I’ve spent years working on this. In those times I come back to this, an oldy but a goody, the serenity prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.
The wisdom to know the difference. That’s the magic sentence. If you can do something to better an outcome, then by all means, use your power to do so. This is of course a productive use of your time and energy.
Where we get lost, is when we go against the flow. Friction occurs because we do not discern that the situation is not within our control. We get stuck and tired when we resist and push against something where we have no power to change the outcome. We push against a pull door while trying to fix another, or fix a situation or even “fix” ourselves when we are actually being guided to let go of control and allow. Instead of heeding that inner knowing voice, we spend time fretting, and come on, be honest, making up stories, fantastical, worst case, doom impending, armageddon, end of life as we know it stories, to try to “control” the outcome, or at least our minds. For many of us it’s a knee jerk reaction. After all we have been socialized and conditioned to view progress as driven by doing. And more doing. Don’t judge that you do it. After all it’s been the only story you’ve known. Simply observe it.
When from observing, the wisdom from the serenity prayer hits and you realize you cannot control this issue, tune into your body for where that tension shows up. Feel for when that friction between “I need to fix” vs “I need to allow” comes up. Then surrender and let that energy go physically as well as mentally. Using visualization is a powerful tool because your brain can’t tell the difference between a story and the “real” life. So tell your body it can let go of that shoulder ache, that lower back pain or that tension headache related to fighting to hang on to control.
Let go of the need to control and its physical manifestation of it in your body. Take a journey of surrender with this week’s meditation and guided visualization: