Experienced. Confident. Willing.

Every day I am grateful that I am only a phone call away from the answers to my many queries. How do I make bread? How did you keep your house so clean? What will I regret the most if I pass up this experience? My paternal grandmother will be 87 years old in April and she has the answers. I try to make the 14 hour drive to celebrate her birthdays with her whenever I can. When I was young, I took for granted the experience and knowledge that life had given her. Now that I am older, I crave those insight often.

At the age of 25 I was facing a serious crossroads in my life, and felt I couldn’t make the decision on my own. I spoke with a therapist and was given a tool that I use to this day. What would your 50 year old self do? She wanted me to think with the confidence and life experience of someone that had “lived”. As I approach that very milestone, it gives me confidence in my decision making. I trust my gut instinct.

I see my 90 year old self as an experienced, confident woman willing to share her successes and failures. Both of which, will have made me who I am. I would like to be able to look in the mirror, and know that I have been kind enough, strong enough, have loved and was loved, unconditionally. The only way I can be that person at 90, is to be that person now. I have faced experiences which have taught me that not everyone gets to be 90. We can’t put off until tomorrow, what we can be today. There isn’t always the chance to do better next week or next year, it becomes imperative to act now. The smallest gestures of kindness can have a ripple effect, and create a legacy of caring that others will always remember. In order to to be kind to others, I believe we need to take care of ourselves – physically, mentally and emotionally. I can’t dip into an empty bucket. Time and financial constraints can cause me to not take care of my own needs as required, but by constantly re-evaluating what makes me happy, it becomes apparent that it isn’t things that cost either. In even the most mundane of tasks I can find the happiness that is life, and with gratitude! Looking back over my 90 years, I’d like to think that I lived with the gate wide open, no regrets, only opportunities to learn and be better next time.

Written by: Jodi Clark