A Strong and Co-operative Mind
As I was cheering on a co-blogger as she embarks on a 100 mile run today, I came across this little video of Sherri.
She is inspiring – 100 miles. At this point it’s a mental game. I am wishing for her the most amazing weather, and a mind that is strong and cooperative. You go, girl! Go!
This brings back fond memories for me; I ran a half marathon five years ago. That’s right, me! I did that! And Sherri’s video nailed all those things being said by my inner voice and the outer world.
Like Sherri in the video, I ran that marathon despite the odds. I did it despite having had major setbacks during training. I did it despite not having the runner’s physique. I did it despite my doctor telling me, as she scribbled a prescription for inhalers for bronchitis that running in two weeks was not recommended. I did it despite the little voice that said, “I can’t do this”.
It was hard, no doubt. It took effort. It took training. It took prioritizing. And it took me leaving my ego at the door. There were a few Sundays during those long training runs where a knee or an ankle would give out, and in tears of frustration I would call my husband to have him come rescue me from wherever I was hobbling. Into the ice bath I went, and back to the massage therapist or the foam roller, because quitting was not an option.
That day I focused on the next kilometer ahead of me. All I had to do was get through 1 km. That’s all. And as that kilometer passed, I focused on the next. The most amazing thing was the strangers on the side of the road calling my name and encouraging me on. One foot in front of the other, and one small step at a time and eventually two hours and 24 minutes later, red faced, sweaty and breathing hard, I crossed that finish line.
This memory couldn’t have come at a better time. I can easily see through the excuses of my clients, and their own limiting beliefs. Probably because I am not attached to them; however it seems I am deceived more easily by my own inner chatter. A few weeks ago, I wrote a post about taking a break from wine. Now that I have been doing it, I see that it’s doable, and I am really benefiting from better sleep and loss of heartburn. And yet, I was held captive for months by that inner voice saying, “I can’t” and “it’s too hard” before actually taking those first steps. To that little voice I say, “Liar!”
Another thing I’ve been doing is a killer kind of yoga called Forrest Yoga. These poses are hard. Like my runners body, my yoga body is unconventional. Gravity works harder on me than the other fit ladies in the class. I remember the first time the instructor said, “Downward dog against the wall”. Wait what? The ladies easily got in the pose and whipped their legs up against the wall. The first thing I heard was that little voice. I think it even laughed as it said “no bleeping way”. It took six months of sweating, grunting, and falling, but I too can now get both legs up the wall. Yes, I’ve nailed the pose. In your face, little voice, I did it!
I recently started a new corporate job and am trying to balance this with expanding my healing practice. “I can’t,” says the little voice, “it’s too hard, there’s not enough time”. For the first few weeks I again became a victim to the story. But then one foot in front of the other and I can say that so far I’ve been nailing the job and increasing the number of healing sessions I’m offering. Ah, little voice, you got me again. But I am awake now.
I take this now into my next big step, at least for me. It’s taken me over 40 years to love me as I am, curves, and extra padding, and all. Now it’s time to lose some of those curves, and not from a looks or feeling confident perspective, but because I am again tuning into a body that says I am tired from carrying this extra weight. And of course I have been wrestling with it listening to the little voice that says “life is short, eat the sweet treat” or “you have too many things on the go right now, don’t put so much pressure on yourself”. Ha! I am on to you little liar! I can and I will. Plus, I’ve published it in this site, so now it’s out there, I have to do it.
In all seriousness though, the challenge is always bigger in my head. Once I actually take that first step and the second, I realize it isn’t nearly as bad as the little voice made it out to be.
Quiet the voice that says “I can’t”. It’s a liar! Whenever I hear “I can’t” I will remember instead this picture that says “I did!”