Music of Joy

 In Weekly Forum Discussion, Writer in Residence

I doubt myself some days. My vision seems far away. I won’t be able to renew my mind, body and soul. I will be crippled here forever.

I don’t want to go anywhere. I will lay on the floor in my own self pity. I force myself out into the bitter cold world. It is on my calendar. This is one of my things I have scheduled for my year of renewal.

I am at the symphony. The music starts. I am transformed. I am alone at the symphony, crying and full of joy. Music is my gift. I have been given a refresh. The music is so powerful. It speaks to me. I can hear the words it says to me. I am enough. I got this. I am valuable. I am liked. I am loved. I am silly. I am fun. I am capable. I will succeed. My life will be a beautiful story not a tragedy.

I love wild flowers. I use to pick them as a child and make little bouquets. I would take them around the neighborhood and set them on door steps. I don’t think the neighbors knew who they were from. That didn’t matter to me. I just wanted to brighten someone’s day. This is what the symphony did for me. The music brightened my day.

When you spend most of your time alone you need to validate yourself. I don’t get flowers, chocolates, I love you, and I care about you. My vision board has flowers, love, greatness, and caring. This board represents the woman I am and the woman I want to continue to be. It reminds me to be a bright light for others. I am valuable. You are valuable. I am great. I think you are great.

My vision board also contains music notes. Music moves my soul, makes my body dance and then opens my mind into creating artistic dance. I feel alive, free and lovely. On a day I scheduled a month in advance. I am restored by the music. Did I know a month ago on this day I would need the symphony? The universe is an amazing thing!

I left the symphony full of love. I did something I haven’t done in years. I stopped and listen to the music. Music is phenomenal. This music was my gift to myself.

I went home and did something else I haven’t done in years. I baked! I baked Valentine’s cookies for my children. My children are adults now. I will have to wait and see what their response will be to their baked gift. I know one thing for sure, my children will be happy, I didn’t burn the cookies. See miracles can happen 🙂

Recommended Posts