Give Yourself Time

 In Weekly Forum Discussion


Written by: Kate McDowell; A Better You


What?! Why NOT?! So many things come to mind… where to even begin?!

Fear of success is definitely something I can resonate with and, as many things that bring up fear, it’s linked to past experiences that I haven’t come to terms with. Everything is a lesson really. Failure is not a sign that you shouldn’t try again, it’s often an indication that you SHOULD, with lessons from the last experience.

I spent 12 years of my life working hard to succeed as a retail manager. I poured my heart and soul into my team, and my job. Out of nowhere, I was terminated because I was too successful, which made me too expensive in the eyes of the company. In reality, it was a blessing. I was meant for so much more than the corporate slavery, but that doesn’t change the way it made me feel, and still does.

As entrepreneurs, it’s pretty crazy how often fear of failure is paired with fear of success. For me anyway, the fear of failure is a fear of being SEEN as a failure, or judged for not being good enough. As a health coach, I’ve seen the fear of failure hold a lot of people back as well because “I could fail, so why even risk that pain?” The fear of success I find is often a fear of change. “What if I DO reach my health/business/financial/fame goals? Will my friends and family still love me? What will the new pressures be like?” The list goes on and on… Success can bring life changes, and that can be scary.

Mediocrity is comfortable and many times I end up on that path without even realizing it. Mediocrity doesn’t require any hard decisions and it doesn’t require putting yourself first or sacrificing any relationships. It also doesn’t hold the possibility of everything being pulled out from under you in the end.

2019 was a challenging year in my world. There were some successes, and many lessons. Networking and spending time around inspiring people, putting a lot of energy into education and personal growth, and stepping out of comfort zones has gotten me closer to the path towards success. I’ve learned the importance of being fluid in my goals and acceptance/adaptation as they change along the way. At this point, I’m not yet sure what the ultimate success looks like for me, but I’m proud of progress I’ve made towards figuring that out.



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