Drinking the Right Information
At first it seemed like this topic had landed in the wrong week for me. I felt less happy and upbeat than I did all those past weeks. And I also wasn’t as productive and structured. All of that was also the reason I procrastinated about my post. A part of me still is very much programmed to seeing productivity and getting things done as evidence for being good enough. For that part of me I am only enough when I do enough or do the right things. To write it out like this makes it obvious how utterly ridiculous this programming is for me or anyone else. In my eyes, a baby doesn’t have to do anything to be enough, why do I?
It really comes down to making the decision to embrace the real truth. “I am not good enough” never was truth so I don’t have to decide to be enough. It’s as if my mind played tricks on me using all kinds of experiences and memories as evidence that I am not (good) enough when in reality I always was enough. The problem wasn’t that I was indeed not enough; the problem was always that I couldn’t see myself as enough. It’s a problem of perceiving the wrong information as truth, so to speak.
In order to change that, I connected “I am enough” with something for which I have hard evidence that I am good at: the tracking app for my water intake. I am rocking this app for over a month now, not missing a single day. I definitely drink enough. With every sip I take I connect with the truth of “I am enough,” basking in the warmth of self-acceptance and at the same time indulging in the idea that it is me who defines what is enough in my life.
This week I also saw a video of Marisa Peer at the awesomeness fest talking about the power of praise and that it is even more effective if it is self-praise. Just as it is worse if you are the one getting down on yourself, it’s better to be the one praising yourself. In the video she invites everyone to praise ones self with exactly the words they have missed being praised with by someone important in their life. Honestly, it feels really weird at first. She goes on to explain that it feels weird because it’s unfamiliar, “Simply make the unfamiliar, familiar.”
Yes, with every sip of water or tea I’ll make my mind more and more familiar with the truth, until that is its natural response to the world: I am enough! (And of course, so are you!)