Show Me the Money, Honey

 In Inspiration, Weekly Forum Discussion


You’ll laugh if you have ever heard one of my rants about people talking about money all the time, but perhaps my most critical and practical why is money. Cold hard. With interest. Stacked with. You got it. Cash.

But I swear, I can explain!

I am an entrepreneur after all. I didn’t know what this meant until I was about 32. My brother had just purchased his first house, and I was hard at building a Homeopathy practice. I was transitioning out of my painting business in those days, and rolling all of my income towards that dream, that vision of a Homeopathy practice. Hustling. My parents gave us each some money, and on the cards they specified what the gift was for. My brother had the house, and that made sense to me. As he opened his card first, I knew why he was being gifted, and we cheered him on. It was a great feeling to boost him into his vision; that was so clear. And it was also clear what he would use that money for. Right away, he said: “Thank you so much. This will go towards a new furnace. I’m going to do that right away, instead of waiting until next year. Wow. Thank you.”

As I sat there with my envelope, and I knew what would be inside, I honestly wondered what the heck I would do with the money. I actually wondered why they were giving me a gift at all!  I felt like I wasn’t doing anything, that I hadn’t accomplished anything concrete yet, or didn’t have anything solid to put the money towards. I didn’t feel like a failure or anything, it wasn’t that at all, but in that split second my very directed goals felt huge and nebulous. I actually felt lost. It was really weird. Looking back I remember that so vividly.

As an aside, it’s interesting to have this example of how the dreaded “unknown” feels acutely. I was instantly, and acutely, an absolute blank slate of potential. I knew exactly what I was doing – why the hustle – until I was handed the $5K of instant expansion. I remember NOT wanting to open the envelope. I remember looking at my brother as a comparison, and thinking I don’t deserve this, I haven’t done anything yet! He was SO clear. Right in front of me, SO clear.  I don’t know what the look was on my face. I remember consciously telling myself to act excited and grateful, but honestly I was never more confused and terrified in my damn life. Well, in THAT direction, that forward direction, towards success. I had of course been terrified and confused about the bad unknown a few times by then! More on that in the next episode of Why Vision by Adrienne J. Yeardye. (aka Y Not?)(that is the answer)(stop!)


Total terror. What the HELL was I doing? I was literally opening an envelope that would move me hugely forward towards my dream, and suddenly I didn’t know who I was. THAT was clear. I was in the textbook “unknown”. And then, there it was. Relief. My Dad had written on the card, that this was a gift to put towards my Entrepreneurial pursuits. I remember being even more confused, and actually saying “I don’t get it. How am I an Entrepreneur?” To me an Entrepreneur was one of those well-dressed yuppie-types in the watch commercial in high school: Pete Smith, Esquire. Those ones.

Anyway, Mum was beaming and nodding. My brother said: “ya Dude!”, and his face was exactly like when we were 10, and the Twilight Zone feeling started happening, and I looked at Dad and he said “You’re on your second business. You’re an Entrepreneur. You can do anything you want right now.” My brother cheered ME on this time, with that little grit-frown people do – and not about the money, that was the funny part, he was cheering me on about my new identifier: Entrepreneur. It was the most beautiful moment. I was suddenly caught by the safety net that is “the unknown”. I was instantly established as “free.” And I instantly got it.

“You can do anything you want right now.” That is definitely a foundational why for me, and an entrepreneurial trait for sure, that need for freedom. BUT, that kind of abundance is so satisfying, that the money part of my vision has been difficult, and I am absolutely not alone. I know so many people who literally do what they love as work, and have to stop doing what they love because they can’t pay the bills. This doesn’t just affect their lives, it affects the lives of the people they serve, and worse, evolution (and revolution) does not include these vitally important minds. Our future is currently tied to an economic structure. That’s a flat fact, and in order for visionaries to compete “easily” and successfully, we must also consider our financial requirements. We must get paid real money, directly. My blogging vision provides a necessary bridge to that often difficult form of abundance, thus providing the bridge between seeker and “expert”, and more importantly, the bridge between “expert” and evolution.

So, today’s exploration of the why oh why do this ridiculously humongous vision of blogging communities leads me to re-visiting one of my most cherished whys. I want to get paid really well for my information, my expertise, and the huge ship of a vision-structure I have built will also provide for so many other experts and entrepreneurs also. They will be able to connect into this structure and become abundant in the satisfaction they get from helping people, the credibility of participating in an information network, the camaraderie of community mentorship, the ease of self-publishing, and yes, definitely the cold hard cash abundance associated with intellectual and experiential capital. They, and me, so the royal we (whoop whoop!) will get paid directly AND indirectly from my vision of a blogging network. Some people will use it to advertise their own businesses, as a way to display their own work, a stage. Some will “work” for me and get paid directly.

Oh, it’s such a beautiful thing. This part I really really love. It’s co-service. Professionals, experts, entrepreneurs, practitioners, visionaries, artists, moms… they will “work” for me and I will “work” for them. Together we will all be paid well, and the world will benefit from our information.

It is truly a win-win.

Here’s a spectacular taste of what is to come. I am painting again of course – that’s a huge part of the current hustle! – and yesterday, my customer paid me in cash. This is twenty-eight $100 bills, and the precise practical reminder of why I am doing what I am doing. I want every one that works with me to feel the freedom THIS kind of abundance provides.

I can do anything I want right now!

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